My very own "Mind Your Language"

It's been a week since I met my two classes (Intermediate & Pre-Intermediate). My students hail from all over the world - literally, namely Angola, Brazil, Columbia, Turkey, France, Italy, Spain, Saudi Arabia, Ivory Coast, Canada, Taiwan, Vietnam, Egypt, Belarus and Yemen! I'm rather proud of myself that I know all student's names - which, of course, sounds very exotic to my South African ears!

My two morning classes (focusing on General English) is 90 minutes long. Sounds like a long class, but in fact, I wish it were longer. Conversation seems to snowball in the class and interesting debates have ensued over the past few days.

The past week has taught me so much, especially how we, as native English speakers take the language for granted. What we regard as "basic" or "everyday" words actually seem to be problem areas for some of my students.

The topics covered so far have been Business and Health. This week, my Intermediate class is studying the unit on Design, while my Pre-Intermediate class is focusing on the Natural World. For each lesson that I prepare, I'm learning just as much as what I'm teaching my students. Sometimes I feel like I'm back at school with the Grammar aspect of it. I must be honest, though - it's not as grueling as I thought it would be...yet!

Some of my friends have joked around saying that I sound like "Mr Brown" from the old British sitcom, Mind Your Language. Honestly speaking, I do feel like Mr Brown - without the intense classroom fighting and minus the pompous principal, Ms Courtney!

Mr Brown & his colourful students in Mind Your Language

Speaking of which, I work with a fantastic bunch of people. Each teacher brings something very special to the staff room.  Many have either traveled extensively or have had several years experience in this industry, making the work environment a very stimulating place to work in. There's always some kind of interesting conversation happening - whether it's about books, theater, teaching methods or lesson idea's.

Everyday when I leave a classroom, I take a bit of my students with me. I love that even though I'm a teacher, I'm learning from them - about their respective countries and cultures - every single day.

Tulsi Vivah

Tulsi (Holy Basil)

Today I attended Tulsi Viva at our mandir (temple). It was my first experience and was curious about its significance. Some of the info below has been taken from here and here.

Tulsi Vivah is the ceremonial marriage of the Tulsi plant to the Hindu god, Vishnu – or his avatar, Krishna. The wedding signifies the end of the monsoon as well as the beginning of the Hindu wedding season.

Mandap (Canopy) for the ceremony

Seo-joon learns "Thank you"

On Sunday, July 11 2010 I met my friend Hye-jin and her gorgeous baby (who I've half-adopted!) Seo-joon for lunch. I met Hye-jin on new years eve (2009) and we've maintained a really good friendship ever since. I've known her through the latter part of her pregnancy and have watched her baby boy growing up.

Seo-joon celebrated his first birthday in March. I get to see him every few weeks and he really does bring a smile to my face. On Sunday, I was giving him a piece of cheesecake in a coffee shop and was blown away by how cute he was. His mum has taught him to give/accept items with both hands extended and to bow his head to say "thank you" which is typical in Korean culture.

Look at this video where I'm giving him a piece of cheesecake. His mum is telling him to use both hands. When she says thank you in Korean, look how he bows his head to the side. Adorable!

Wearing a bindi 'coz I'm a virgin?

Brief Background

My current principal (woman) started at the beginning of this year and the vice principal (man) started at the beginning of this semester. I don't know them as well as I know the previous principal and vice who I was fond of. I only really see them during lunch time when we eat together in the teacher's room along.

Also, I have 2 co-teachers: Mr Oh and Soonhwa. Mr Oh is one of the head teachers so he sits together with the principal and vice principal at a separate table - just a few feet from where I sit. Remember everyone speaks Korean, except if a teacher is talking directly to me. The principal & vice don't speak English.

My Bindi's

For a few years, I've been wearing a bindi everyday. I have dozens and usually match the colour to whatever I'm wearing for the day. Bindi's are a significant part of the Indian culture. For example, a red dot symbolizes that a woman is married. There are many other stories behind the bindi, but to put it simply to people - it's Indian fashion, or as I say here in Korea "Indo pashin" That is, after all, what the bindi has evolved to.

My students are always curious about my bindi's and are very observant when I don't wear one (usually on days when I'm feeling slightly out of balance with myself).


Today at lunch

As I take my seat at lunch, the vice principal walks past saying something to me in Korean while he's pointing to the middle of his brow. He's referring to my bindi. The only word I catch in Korean is "morning" I don't understand what he's saying, and none of the other 8 teachers sitting at the table translate for me. They just sit with their heads bent and start eating their food. This frustrates me because my Korean is not that fluent to understand everything.

I greeted the vice principal this morning and he thought that I wasn't wearing one [bindi]. He assumed that I put one on before coming to lunch. He was mistaken. As he's taking his food, he starts asking questions about my bindi. One teacher tells him that I change it everyday according to what colour clothes I'm wearing. So he becomes curious about how many I have.

Enter Principal

The principal enters and the she's invited into the conversation by the vice (about me) They take their seat next to Mr Oh. I'm trying to eat quickly because I have a deadline to meet, but I can hear snippets of the conversation from the next table. I hear "Indo-saram" (Indian person) and "Nam-Aprika" (South Africa). Of course I ask Soon-hwa if they are talking about me. She nods her head and says she'll tell me later.

'Coz I'm a virgin?

When we're done with classes for the day and sitting in the office, Soon-hwa asks me about my bindi. She wants to tell me about what the principal and vice were talking about. She doesn't look very happy and says that since lunch time she has been trying to think how to tell me this.

"He (vice principal) thinks it is for burden"
"Burden?"
I can't understand her.

She doesn't mean "burden". She means "virgin". He [vice] used a Korean word meaning "female virgin".

My vice principal thinks that I wear a bindi because I'm a virgin.

Am I hearing correctly? Those words just don't fit in a sentence together.

"vice principal" / "bindi" / "virgin"

It gets worse

Apparently he went on to say that boys will probably be very happy when they see me ... knowing that I'm a virgin.

I can't believe I'm hearing this.

Soon-hwa tells me that she was very angry at lunch time, but couldn't tell me at the time. She was upset further that none of the other teachers at my table (all women) reacted to this.

She goes on to tell me that if it was said to a Korean teacher, there would be "big problems".

Why I'm pissed off

• How can a conversation ABOUT ME being a VIRGIN happen right next to me without me knowing? Of course, they were speaking in Korean.
  
  
• The vice principal is old enough to be my father. I hardly know him. He's my superior. I'm the foreign teacher. Why is he talking about such things?
  
  
• Why didn't the principal (a WOMAN) stop this conversation?
  
  
• How can this be a topic at lunchtime in front of my co-teacher, Mr Oh?
  
  
• Why didn't anyone else tell me this? Or react?
  

Need to vent

I tell my friend, Sarah - also a teacher. She doesn't react much. But that's just her. She doesn't show much emotion. And besides, she's not really surprised. To top it off - she'd rather talk about her new boyfriend. So I listen to her and show happiness and excitement for her.

Hit the gym

But I still need to let off steam. So I head to the gym. Seo-gyun is there, but I try to ignore him. Hopefully he'll get the hint. After a while, my gym instructor comes over to me and says, "Condition down?" I want to scream - F*ck YES! I really appreciate him asking me that.

A few hours later

Talking about it and now writing about it, I feel a bit better. There's a lot more I want to say and elaborate on, but I will do that in another blog. There are many things going through my mind - did Soon-hwa translate correctly? What if she misunderstood?

But there are still other things that are frustrating me. I will write more about that maybe tomorrow. For now, I have to take a break and relax.

Peace...

Boob jobs, nose jobs, eyelid jobs - Korean women battle for eternal youth

With some of my colleagues - the ladies always tell me that they're envious of my eyes

I was almost sure that Kim had more exciting news to tell me over dinner last night. After all, we hadn't seen each other in over a month. So I said, "C'mon... what else happened while I was away?!" I knew she had something to tell me, judging from her tone on the phone.

She smiles, turns her head to the side and in a dramatic fashion, she says, "I got a plastic surgery!"

"You got WHAT now?" My mind was racing as to what kind of surgery she had done. She'd better not ask me to "Guess where?" 'cause for the past 25 mins, everything seemed to be in tact since the last time I'd seen her.

Kim covered her mouth as she giggled at my reaction.

"WHERE?!!!" I asked.

"Can you see it?" she probed.

I thought - Ohmygod, please don't be doing this to me! What if I say the wrong thing? Well, her nose seemed fine and I was scanning her face for any scars or unusual marks. But - nothing!

"Please tell me... I can't see!"

So Kim points to her eyes. She explained to me that she had some 'fat' removed from under her eyes as they seemed to be a bit "heavy" and now her skin is "more smooth"

Apparently it was a simple procedure (just an hour). She used her 3-day holiday to have it done.

"It was so painful after", she said. She went on to tell me about blood and bandages and all that .... I don't know 'bout you, but when "blood" and "eyes" are in the same sentence, it freaks me out just a lil' bit!

"You couldn't see it?" she asked me.

I didn't want to dampen her spirits and make her feel as though no one would notice, but I said to her in the best possible way - "Well, it means it was a job well done if it's not noticeable ...AND...as far as I'm concerned - you were beautiful before, and you're beautiful now!"

She put her hands together and dropped her head saying, "Thank you very much!"

Kim has appeared in a few of my stories on here, and if you've been following you'd realize that she can be slightly dramatic, yes?!

I went on, "Can I ask why you did it?"

She sighed. Put her hands to her chest. Threw her head back and said, "I want to be young!"

Kim is in her mid-40s and for a single mum of THREE sons, the woman looks DAMN GOOD. Her body, along with her spirit could easily pass for someone in their late-20s or early-30s.

Two days before this, I'd heard of another teacher at my school who had the same procedure done.

Some Koreans I've met for the first time have almost always made some mention of my eyes. "Wow! So beeeg!" My students have even said to me, "Teacher eyes very beeeg!" (So I tell them that they're big so that I can see *everything* in class - including students at the back of the classroom trying to play games on their cellphones under their desks!)

When our current school principal arrived at the beginning of the year, she leaned in right to my face examining my eyes. She questioned me about all the eye make-up I use and was amazed to know that I don't use mascara.

Korean women have this fascination with eyelids and long for "deep eyes" (like mine...apparently).

Today at lunch, I sat with Mi-na the music teacher. I asked her what her plans were for the week-end. She said she will go to the "maa-saa-gee shop" In other words, she was going to a beauty salon for a facial, which in Korea is known as a "face massage" or in Konglish - "pay-eess maa-saa-gee"

I told Mi-na that she has beautiful skin and that she's always looking radiant. She was very happy to hear that, but went onto say that she isn't feeling very "bright" with her skin these days.

And then she said, "You know...all Korean women want to be young!"

So many of my Korean colleagues have flawless, milky skin. Wow! When I say "flawless", I mean not a blemish to be seen. They're *so* lucky, I always used to say. Until one day, another friend / colleague (Sarah) pointed out that So-and-So-Teacher had "work done" which is *why* she has skin resembling a baby's bottom.

I know of another colleague who goes for regular laser hair removal treatment - not that Koreans have that much body hair (but that's for another post) I also know of many ladies who have had eyebrow / eye liner / lip liner tattoos done. Of course, they don't make a big hoo-haa about the procedures they undergo, but are often the envy of many friends who also long to look young for as long as possible!

Going under the knife is very common here in Korea. Celebrities in their 40s, 50s and above do it as though it's the most natural thing ever. And the thing is, it *looks* so natural. Their skin looks extremely supple and healthy and doesn't really leave them looking like some messed up procedures I've seen before.

Some of my Korean friends also tell me that they are envious of my "high nose". And... another thing most of my Korean lady friends tell me is that they wish they had more ("zig zag action across their chests")

Kim told me she'd be going back to have her eyelids done. She (along with many other Korean women) long for deep eye sockets.

Well, I say - whatever makes you happy :)

So I thought *that* was Kim's big news. I guessed we'd be wrapping up dinner and heading home soon, but then she says to me: "I think you have a secret, and I have a secret!"

I have no secret.

I sit back and wait for her to tell me the rest of her news. She just looks at me and grins. And I know immediately what's happened.

My "beeg" eyes grow even wider and I gasp, "You met a guy?!"

...I know her far too well by now, and judging from her expression I knew I was right :)

The social life cycle of a Korean woman

One of my majors at university was Anthropology. I have a curious mind about people and cultures - about family life, work ethics, expectations from society and so on. Contrary to other foreigners I know here, I have more Korean friends than I have foreign friends. And I've learned so much about the lifestyle through them. I know about Korea's good, bad and ugly sides!

Today, Kim shared this with me relating to Korean culture. It's something that Koreans believe 'happens' - of course, it's just a generalization! (and how we reached this in our conversation is blurry to me now)

For the purpose of this blog, I've created a character to illustrate what I'm trying to say.
We'll call her Sue.

• When Sue is in her teens (age 13-19), others may be envious of her beauty/academics at school. As with most teenage rivalry - regardless of where you live in this world, she has 'everything' and is usually the first to start dating during Middle School.
  
  
• When Sue is in her 20's, she may have plastic surgery done without many people knowing (VERY COMMON in Korea), and other girls will admire her thinking that she's *so* blessed to be *so* beautiful. Also, Sue will date a string of guys. She's the girl everyone wants to be seen with.
  
  
• When Sue is in their 30's, others will be envious of her because she's settled down with a very decent husband who works in the corporate heart of Seoul. Of course, no one forgets her reputation during her 20's. They are bitter that she was able to have soooo many guys on her list and STILL settle down with someone *nice*
  
  
• When Sue is in her 40's, others will be envious of her children who will be well-educated and attend private academies which means they'll enter top universities which will almost secure them with a high-status/high-paying job.
  
  
• When Sue is in her 50's, others will be envious of her figure. Believe me when I say that Korean women are fierce when it comes to their health and physical appearance. Sue is the kind of person who can eat 'anything' and still have killer thighs and a flat tummy.
  
  
• ...and it's when Sue reaches the golden years of her 60's that others (women?!) are the *most* envious of her. It's a possibility she may be widowed during these years. Her husband (a businessman) would have left her *tons* of cash. Her children are about to settle into their own (perhaps married) lives. Ummm, Sue *MAY* even decide to take on a university 'toyboy' for when she's feeling lonesome - Yes! This happens :)
  
  
• Sue is "free" once again - and as she gracefully ages, still strutting down the streets of Gangnam in her designer suits and heels, other women will still look at her and be green with envy. Sue *REALLY* had it good during her entire life!
  

Of course, this is a major generalization about Korean women, but I'm sure it can relate to women elsewhere in the world?!

Anyways... just something light-hearted and fun :)

Dead Sea Scrolls - the birth of Christianity

On Saturday, I went to the War Memorial of Korea to see the Dead Sea Scrolls display. They are said to be the most important archaeological find of the 20th century and consist of over 800 documents - some of which are complete and incomplete. The scrolls are mostly made of dried animal skins on which Hebrew & Greek texts were written The scrolls were discovered in caves along the shores of the Dead Sea between 1947 and 1956.

The scrolls are considered to be vitally important as they are apparently the oldest copies of the Bible. There are many other artifacts on display, including gold jewelry, coins and items used in temples that are believed to have been used during Jesus' period.

It was awesome seeing everything, except that all the captions & explanations were in Hangul.

Van Gogh ~ Voyage into the Myth

On Saturday night, I did the arty thing....because one of the greatest painters in the world is currently visiting South Korea. Vincent Van Gogh's most cherished works are currently on display at the Seoul National Museum. The artist has been described as depressed, elusive and misunderstood. Like any other exhibition, I think it's imperative to know the artist's history before being lost in the amazing art pieces.

Naturally, no photo's were allowed, but these are pics that were taken from the gift shop:

Pepero Day

Pepero sticks are like the chocolate-dipped pretzel sticks we get in South Africa. The maker's of this popular snack in Korea invented "Pepero Day". It is celebrated on November 11 because the numerical date (11/11) resembles four Pepero sticks! On this day, people give Pepero boxes to their lovers and friends (almost like a Valentine's Day?!)

Because Pepero Day falls on a Sunday this year, kids at school exchanged Peporo boxes on Friday. I was really spoiled because I received Pepero gifts from my students and a few teachers.